Idiocracy in the Missouri bureaucracy

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Sex between lobbyists and politicians could be considered a “gift” now in the Missouri legislature! Say goodbye to cash and golf sessions, Missouri lobbyists could now use a new “persuasion tactic” to get the right votes from politicians!

Realistically, this “persuasion tactic” is already being used. The idea behind the bill by Representative Bart Korman is to make these affairs more visible to the public.

Four years ago, Missouri narrowly dodged the bullet that was Todd Akin. For months in 2012, the state of Missouri was the butt of countless jokes and reprimands following Todd Akin’s idiotic statement: “If it’s a case of legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut the whole thing down.” With one sentence, Todd Akin was able to convince most of America that all of us here in Missouri did not know what rape was and had no idea how the female body works. Thankfully, when the election came around, Claire McCaskill won the Senate seat for Missouri, and the Show Me state has since been protected from the potentially disastrous bills and votes of Todd Akin on the national level. The country gradually forgot about Todd Akin’s little mishap, and we settled back into the somewhat forgotten state in the middle of America.

But for Missouri, these scandals and embarrassing statements happen more often than not, it seems. Last year, the Missouri Speaker of the House, John Diehl, was forced to resign after a sexting scandal with an intern. We all heard about that one, too. It seems the Missouri lawmakers just cannot help making fools of themselves and Missouri as a whole.

In an attempt to combat these scandals, Representative Korman is introducing a bill that would, if passed, list sex between lobbyists and politicians as a “gift” similar to sports tickets or money. This bill excludes any lobbyist married or dating to a politician. The other lobbyists who happen to end up in bed with a politician are then required to file a report documenting their “gift.” Because sex and a Cards game are clearly interchangeable now.

This bill initially sounded like it would legalize prostitution, but only between politicians and lobbyists. The lobbyist, in this instance, would be paid by whichever company they represent for sleeping with whichever politician they need the vote from. Which would make the lobbyist a person who is having sex in exchange for money. But this kind of activity happens in our government, and with Missouri’s legislators specifically, on an everyday basis anyways. Korman’s goal with this bill is simply to make these “transactions” more transparent.

I expect nothing less of Korman, since he is a Republican, than to put more restrictions on what people can and cannot do with their bodies, considering the vast restrictions on women’s bodies they are already trying to impose. I am not in any way trying to condone the current behavior of any lobbyist, but is revealing their sex lives and the sex lives of the Missouri politicians is a violation of the fourth amendment’s right to privacy. The Supreme Court worked this out with Roe vs. Wade more than 40 years ago when dealing with abortion. Lawmakers and lobbyists are people, too, even if some their actions do not agree with all of the morals that you believe in.

The lobbyist situation is a real problem, but it does not start with recording everyone’s private sex lives. The state of Missouri has no regulations on the amount of gifts a lobbyists can give to a politician to influence certain votes to one way or another. Stopping the corruption in the government starts with introducing bills to limit these gifts from lobbyists to politicians. Adding sex to the list of gifts lobbyists can give to politicians is not going to help our situation. Korman’s time would be more efficiently used if he could write and argue a bill stopping lobbyists from taking politicians to golf and dinner and sports events. He could introduce a bill to prevent lobbyists from paying politicians for their votes in Congress. And he could do all of these without violating the fourth amendment. Although I understand why he might avoid the laws that could potentially apply to his own life, since he recently came under fire for attempting to hold a House Committee meeting in a country club.

I cannot imagine that this bill would ever actually be passed. Korman introduced this bill to the Missouri House of Representatives on January 7. By the time this article is printed, this bill will have been shut down entirely. But, what worries me, besides the sex scandals and general lack of information in the Missouri capital, is the countless hours have been devoted to this bill. Hours that could have been used to improve the life and wellbeing of the Missouri citizens. We need bills limiting the other “gifts” from lobbyists and start trying to remove them from politics altogether. We need bills addressing the overpopulated prison systems. We need bills to help ensure and encourage graduation from high school and help to get through college. We do not need to be wasting time to argue about sex and lobbyists.